how to work thru negative core beliefs

In this follow up blog, I wanted to show the process of replacing a negative Core Belief with a healthier version. Did you discover anything new about yourself after the latest blog? Or perhaps you paused to consider, "What do I bring with me, thinking of core beliefs, that help tell me who I am?" And then, did you take an extra moment to realize...you can be whoever you desire to be, re-write your narrative, release what does not serve you and become empowered to make any positive changes needed as you grow and evolve?

All of this can be true! You are the only one creating your story - you are the editor-in-chief. You are responsible for the direction, content strategy and the quality of your life journey. It's a great job!

Changing our lifestyle and mindset is neither a quick nor easy task. It requires significant focus and awareness. After spending time understanding what Core Beliefs are, identifying some of your own Core Beliefs, challenging the negative ones, and replacing them with healthier beliefs, you might feel -as if you've left a part of yourself behind. That's perfectly fine. You're now progressing forward.

Realizing that negative Core Beliefs are baseless or unsupported by evidence paves the way for new thoughts. These thoughts can enhance self-esteem, reduce insecurities, and remove the factors that fuel anxiety and self-doubt. Let's explore whether we can alter your feelings by examining the emotion wheel and identifying your true emotions while we work through a couple of basic Core Beliefs.

This is a common Core Belief many people have.

CORE BELIEF

"I'm not as good as others"

INFORMATION THAT SUPPORTS MY CORE BELIEF

I didn't get my dream job

I don't have many friends

I don't get invited to anything

INFORMATION THAT DOES NOT SUPPORT MY CORE BELIEF - DISTORTIONS

My Distortion is: This is the best job I'll ever have

My Distortion is: Anything corrective or negative will stop me from changing

My Distortion is: What few friends I have reach out very rarely

FACTS AGAINST CORE BELIEF -

Fact is: I am very good at whatever job I hold.

Fact is: I am educated, I need to use my smarts to figure out how to go farther

Fact is: A couple of people have reached out to me to meet for coffee and I need to also reach out and make plans with them

I have restructured my mindset and eliminated the outdated Core Belief that I am "not as good as others," which was unfounded. Now, I can confidently feel proud of myself and my work, which I excel at and intend to expand further. I am also nurturing relationships and realizing that my efforts are directly linked to my self-perception.

Boom - you just tossed aside a negative Core Belief that was not serving you in any way.

What's next!

Let's try another!

CORE BELIEF

"I'm not capable of change"

INFORMATION THAT SUPPORTS MY CORE BELIEF

(what supports- that the core belief is true)

I still drink and smoke too much

I still speak to my significant other with disrespect

I have the same job I've had forever

INFORMATION THAT DOES NOT SUPPORT MY CORE BELIEF -DISTORTIONS

(What are the un-true thoughts I have about the core belief being true)

Distortion: This is the life that I have been given

Distortion: It's too late for me to make changes, I will live in my (secret) misery

Distortion: Drinking and smoking and weak relationships are the best part of my day

FACTS AGAINST CORE BELIEF

(what is radically honestly true that destroys the core belief)

Fact is: I know I have a ton of friends who love & support me

Fact is: I have dreams for my future and can take control of my fear

Fact is: My significant other still loves me, I can nurture that

Fact is: I can ask for help - it's not a weakness, it's an awakening

You can be whatever kind of person you desire. It's ok to be wherever you are in life, and want for more. Never think it's too late, never think it's too early! It's just time. And as you read passages that inspire you, conversations that empower you, information that educates you, go ahead and step forward for yourself. Begin again.

While writing the previous blog and starting this piece, I've been revisiting my emotion wheel and working through more core beliefs. I'm also taking time to happily recall wonderful and positive memories. I love that healing can come from being in a state of happiness, satisfaction, and support. And while I talk about breaking negative, generational chains, it's equally important to acknowledge and cherish the positive generational chains. Families, whether related by blood or not, thrive through great support of each other. And that support system leads to celebrations, proud moments, promotions, graduations, engagements, and accomplishments. It's the multitude of wonderful details that unite us and form our community. I constantly seek more happiness, more connection, more conversation.

So many beautiful people have been welcomed into our home as we grow and evolve

Had Christian not approached me years ago to encourage me and to inspire me to live a better life...I would have missed it all! Rising up from that chair where I had sat for a very long time in the dim corner of my dark bedroom, and deciding to change my life through this therapy, was the best decision I have ever made.

As you conclude this article on Core Beliefs, take a moment for yourself. Remember that you are important, you are worthy, and you are progressing. If you haven't started yet, now is an excellent time to begin journaling. Writing to the most important person in your life—yourself—journaling will offer significant benefits. Document what is influencing you, any changes in your emotions, your goals, or even how this exercise has impacted your thoughts. Simply write.

And by the way...I threw that chair out!